Going Against the Grain

Objectively speaking I am not a bread enthusiast. That’s the truth.

But, dear breadheads, I will endeavour to be that persevering idealist; that timeless agent of truth – that which folklore refers to as a so-called ‘bread head’. Join me, as I begin this intransient foray into the starry-eyed world of bread (and other things); as I attempt to demystify the love that so many people have for this gallant, all-encompassing carbohydrate. 

Basically I’m going to be talking about bread, and what I think of when I eat said bread. That rhymes! By the way, can you think of something that rhymes with ‘orange’? If not, I am afraid to inform you that you are not Eminem, because he totally can. No, seriously:

‘Still in my skull’s a vacant empty void been usin’ it more as a bin for storage

Take some inventory

In this gourde there’s a Ford engine, door hinge, syringe, an orange an extension cord and a ninja sword

Not to mention four linchpins, an astringent stored…’

If you are Eminem, that’s cool too. I’m a huge fan of your songs, dude. Although I can’t seem to understand why you insist on screaming ‘Mr. Worldwide’ before every single one of them.

Anyway, I digress. This is a bread blog first and foremost, as you lovely people will soon see. I’ll try to be as regular as I can, but I really can’t tell you when I will return. One thing’s for sure, though:

I’ll be baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack (Terminator voice).